Emotion

Children with Autism disorders, FAS and other developmental problems do not show a lot of emotion except frustration and anger. Frankly, neither do I but I choose to call that menopause. I'm pretty sure that my language and attitude when I was out driving was much sweeter 20 years ago- oh who am I kidding, I made sailors blush then too.  But the point is, I don't have a reason for my behavior or for not showing other emotions, but those afflicted with these syndromes do. Dakota is no different. He can go from 0-60 on the anger or frustration scale in 4.8 seconds; however this is much better than it used to be.  What troubles me more is not showing other emotions. And its not because I don't think he has them- he must- but because I worry about how he is doing inside and how not showing them or understanding them will effect him throughout adulthood.

There is a little girl in Dakota's class - they have been together since 1st grade. Last year (3rd grade) she left about halfway through. I found out that she was taken away from her home because her mom beat her. She was not there the first weeks of school but now she's back. Dakota told me this one evening and I said great. His response, "Yeah, her dad trusts her now" (I assume he was trying to say that her dad is trusted now to take care of her). I was still concerned because it was her mom -I think- that actually was abusive so I asked if he had seen her mom, "Yeah, he said, "she trusts her too. She doesn't hit her anymore." Very matter of factly. When I asked how all this made him feel he said- "Nothing". We tried to explain emotion words to him like sad, angry, happy, scared and asked if he felt any of these- no. I don't think he has memories of the abuse he suffered as a child in his birth home but I don't know so I can't say if this makes him think of his experience or feel as he did then. Would he rather forget it, or is this part of his disability that he does not know how to express these things or even what they are? I am going to be asking some experts these questions- I'l keep you posted.